Goodbye

“Goodbyes”- are very hard for me to deal with and for most, I guess. Be it any form: Merely waving bye to anyone at airports or railway stations or simply “parting” from people whom you love, instigates a pricking pain deep inside.
Just bid farewell to a friend, and this one is a little different as she has left us forever.

What can I say about this ever-high spirited person who would have a wide smile and have a non-stop chit chat with you whenever and wherever you meet her.
Relationship usually builds with age, but with her- even a first timer would experience that special bond , which may seem like you had it with her for ages.
A unique charm that one holds and a rare find. I do not know her very well on a personal note, but well enough to leave a long lasting memory as she bids adieu to this world. She fought cancer that ravaged her body until her last breath and fought it with all her might and was never ready to give up.

It is unimaginable to think that a person is gone forever from our day today lives and its of course, the hardest for immediate family.How hard it is to believe that the person who slept in the bedroom next to you, who sat and watched TV with you, who was part of your daily chores in life and who does a dozen things with you, has suddenly vanished ! It is so strange as the feeling is like digging a pit, that grows bigger and bigger and the vacuum left behind is unexplainable.

With mom, I must admit that not much of tears were shed, the day she left, as my heart and mind were just void. The feeling terribly hit me for the first time 2 days later, when I was rummaging the shelves for something and was about to call out her name “Mummy, where is it, I can’t find it”- I almost uttered it, thinking she is just in the kitchen and would come right there to help me find it.
That instant reaction “God, Damn it! She is gone”- It was horrendous.

Numerous things were undone, and numerous thoughts were unsaid; I wish I had said it while she was there, for example this ”Lemon rice” that she packed for me during my journey to Bombay- was delicious in every sense. I asked for the recipe, and she simply asked me to watch her when she makes it again which I never got a chance to.

“Time-is the healer”- the consoling words as they all say it, but time also gives you that gruesome realization again and again and again, that your loved one is no longer with you. All we can do is helplessly accept it as Shakespeare says- World is a stage and we are mere players here, And yeah, the one above has the full right to decide our exits and entrances to it.

My friend would be fondly remembered, for the ever charming person she is, and I pray that “He” may give all the strength to her family to cope with this terrible loss.